Friday, December 5, 2008

Suspect Loses The Game

I was standing outside, thinking my usual thoughts about how little what we were doing makes sense, perfectly satisfied with my moderate rebel mentality, when one tiny firing of a neuron or synapse or whathaveyou completely screwed it all up for me.

Oh man this is ridiculous. Why would they even BOTHER having us do any of this? Makes no sense at all, none of the new guys are even here right now to learn from it, and all of us are getting out in a few months, it's so undeniably moronic. Seriously, why? If there's nothing for us to do, they should just let us chill. How awesome would that be? My job would basically be to just hang out and wait to get out of the Army. I would get PAID for that.

I get paid for this.

I have to do this because they pay me.

No! NO! FUCK! TAKEITBACK!!! FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU--




You know how there are some things that you can't unsee? Doors that you can't close again once you open them, revelations that you can't forget? Well this was mine. God DAMN it.

16 comments:

Anonymous said...

Heheh! You Funny!

membrain said...

Good one Suspect.

bigD said...

Hey Suspect,
Are you doing too much thinking again? I have always loved your "What the f*ck?" moments! Sorry this one was so painful for you.
Just remember...an idle mind is the devil's playground. Ha, ha.
Here are some questions to take your mind off the Theater of the Absurd there at Fort Lewis.
1. Wuz up wit skool? What have you larnt?
2. Have you been able to quit smoking? I am rooting for you. ;)
3. How was the Metallica concert?
I hope your ears aren't bleeding too much.

God(s) bless you Ryan. You still rock my socks!

Jean said...

You really shouldn't scare yourself like that.
Have a drink.

TheUsualSuspect said...

Yep, I quit smoking. I haven't done shit for school because I'm a horrible procrastinator. And the Metallica concert was infuckingcredible. Ridiculously so.

bigD said...

Hey Suspect,
Big ups, props and major kudos to you! That news made me smile :P
Keep on rockin' in the free world.
God(s) bless you Ryan.

P.S. - It's all good...school can wait!

Anonymous said...

Awesomeawesomeawesome on the smoking!!!!!!!!!!!!! Good man! Now do that for the rest of your life! I'm so glad!

Haterade said...

Big Tobacco will not be pleased...quitter.

membrain said...

Kudos on quitting smoking. Been there; done that. It was hell. So I have a lot of respect for what it takes with all of the shit going on in your life. (Being in the Army and all.)

Glad to hear about the Mettallica concert.

Like Jean said. Have a drink.

themorethingschange.... said...

*big grin*

Sometime those ah-ha moments sneak up on ya, sometimes they smack ya in the kisser!

~P~

Jean said...

Merry Christmas, Suspect!

Anonymous said...

Merry Christmas!

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Be happy.

Anonymous said...

Happy New Year, Suspect! Just think, another year down already...

JT said...

Thanks for your writing and time.
I just found your blog and had to read it from the start.
So it was fun to scroll to the bottom of each month, scroll up to find the oldest entry, read by scrolling down, then scroll up to find the next oldest entry and repeat... It was like reading a book but in a much more ass backwards way- maybe the army designed it?!
So if you keep writing I promise to keep reading, oh more than every 3 years(if you care which you probably don't).
Congratulations on being a quitter (smoking thing) and wishing you a burst of energy to work on the school thing.
It was interesting to hear you talking about looking back at your older entries- we all are changed, it's all to what degree and what amount of baggage we're trucking around. I think the universal though is most of us going through it saying WTF.
So anyway a rambling message saying thanks and I hope you'll stick with it some more.

Anonymous said...

So, are you out yet, or about out, or what? Are we going to see "The Unlikely Civilian" next? I wonder what you're like unconstrained...? :)